Hi Hard Girl,

I can’t believe it has been only 6 days since my last post. It feels a like thousand years. You guys make me want to be a better writer. I am grateful for that. So, it is another Thursday and talker extraordinaire has something for you.

Quick announcement: The team has dedicated the month of May to celebrate mothers. Send a picture of your mother, could be both of you; add a write-up, in a few words, telling us why you think she deserves to be celebrated and send it to [email protected].  We will help you celebrate her in a simple yet, classy way. 


This week’s piece is dedicated to my good friend, Mercedes Rowe Asamani and her upcoming book entitled Beyond the Clitoris which I am glad to be a contributor to. Watch out for the complete pack for womanhood. 


Do you remember this song, “To w’abodo gu nsu n’ani, na dakye bi wo nsa b3ka.” (Translation: Cast your bread upon the water, for one day it will return to you)? It is an admonishment to practice giving in the present and reaping later. Instead of hoarding our gifts and opportunities, we should rather scatter them. The secret to increasing is giving. No wonder it is said, givers never lack.

A few months back, my friend, Mercedes, created a WhatsApp group and added a few other ladies including yours truly. When I came online and saw ‘Beyond the Clitoris’ as the group name. Interesting. To cut a long story short, she wanted us to contribute to an anthology that talked about everything related to women, all the fun and agonizing experiences; from relationships to health problems. I must say, this project is essential and I am glad to be a part of it. I won’t tell you about my contribution now. It will be a spoiler. When the time comes, you’ll read it, alongside the other interesting stories the ladies in the group have shared. It is a complete pack of women issues; a must read. Anticipate.

She could have done this alone. In this world of technology and abundance of information, she could have researched, strung together words to produce a great book; she didn’t. She invited us to join her make this dream a reality. She saw the need to make others share in her vision. This selflessness is one in a million. Most women lack it, which is disheartening. The secret we miss is the more one shares, the more they receive. Some women hoard opportunities and gifts to themselves because they think when other women are privy to it, they would be pushed aside, whether they are qualified or not. Kudos to the women who know the importance of sharing.

We are selfish and insecure. We bar our friends who have the potential to help augment our dreams and aspirations from doing so. Apart from the glass ceiling, our selfishness is the main reason we still have little or no women in some key positions.

I have seen it happen to countless ladies including myself. We are our own enemies. We are obligated to push our fellow women. It does not mean when she does not qualify, you consider her because she is a woman. Far from that. We need women up there. Let us join hands to push as many competent women as possible to the peak.

What you don’t know is. The more you allow your selfish tendencies to overtake you, the more you make women lose hope in themselves and humanity. They are being unfairly treated by some men only for them to face same or even worse treatment from women. Those who are supposed to understand them most do not. We tend to give our fellow women enemy statuses instead of being a team. Selfishness and greed have clouded us and we losing the mark every day.

I understand you fear the repercussions. Not all women become pompous when given the power to lead a group of people; Not all women are unproductive. You must realize that men also possess the same traits. Incompetence is not a manual that comes with the female gender. It is inherent in all of us – males and females. There are good women out there. Give them work to do and you will not regret it. We are tired of helplessly watching on while people are praised for substandard works that we could have done excellently. We need women up there; women who will be role models to other young ladies. Help make a change.

Let it not be said of you that you are the an enemy of the women folk and reason why some ladies sold their bodies and souls for work. I do not support their methods, mind you, and I will never do so. Stop being selfish.

Like Mercedes, there are women out there who understand the need for women to contribute to making the world a better place. After all, we are the majority of the world’s population. Sad how we contribute only 10% to the world’s economy. It could be more if you help push the serious and ready to work women to realize their goals.

Like the Akan adage goes, “nea )foro dua pa na y3pia no” (He who embarks on a good cause is encouraged. Push someone today to the top. Share their posts and ads on social media; purchase made in Ghana goods; instead of always seeking for free services, sow into their businesses. Look out for opportunities out there and link the right ladies. Do not be your own enemy. Let us all do this together.


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